What would you do as Batman's unhinged temporary sidekick?

Firstly, you have to use an alias to hide your identity. Choose from the four options below. PS: Remember, you're unhinged. You don't actually have these powers; you made it up!

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Socrates Theo (The basketball player): Turns inflated basketballs into a flying disc that can spy on ANYONE.
Foxan Isabelle (The Fashion designer): Has an army of self-walking clothes that can capture anyone by demand.
Cheerin' Chels (The Cheerleader): Uses cheer routines to control the minds of individuals.
Fuelin' Fonz (Professional Biker): Wears a unique leather jacket that can turn into a weapon when activated by a button on the inside.

You see these balloons as you walk to meet Batman at a secret location. You overhear that once the balloons explode, they'll release sleeping gas. What would you do?

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I'll get a pin and pop one of the balloons to see if there's actually sleeping gas in them.
I'll call Batman and ask him if I can borrow the Batmobile so I can hide in it when the gas is released.
I'll steal all the balloons and give them to Gotham residents as they walk by.

It's the Joker's birthday! Everyone in Gotham is invited to his party, well, except Batman. As you arrive, you notice people running out of the Joker's residence, screaming for help when the villain's accomplices showcase lasers. What would you do?

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I'd ask if they can keep the noise down in case the neighbors are asleep.
I'd go inside the home and ask the Joker if I could have a slice of cake.
I'd run inside and tell the Joker where everyone ran off to, just in case they're playing hide 'n seek.

Batman was lured into this dark, dusty location by Catwoman. She allowed you to convince her to release the hero. Yet, instead you say:

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"Come on guys, I don't like the dark!"
"Um, we're on a schedule. So, if you can stop indulging in mayhem, that'll be cool!"
"I'm double parked outside, and Batman's not paying me enough, so can you release him? I can't afford a ticket."

Batman went to get groceries for a Gotham resident, scared to go outside. He specifically told you not to play with his specially-made color bombs. Since you're unhinged, you throw one to see its color. Batman comes home and sees this! What would you say?

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"You should be careful with those things, Batman! If you throw it, it'll explode!"
"Can you hide these from me next time? You know how I can get!"
"Who are you going to get to clean this up? I'd hate to be them."

You and Batman are fighting the Joker and his crew. Someone throws a shoe at you, so Batman swings on a rope and kicks them on their back. As the villain's accomplice lies on the ground, you say:

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"Do you have to pay his hospital bill?"
"Teach me how to kick like that! Share the talent."
"Woah, dude, is that legal?"

Egghead is on a mission to steal every egg in Gotham. Batman sends you to stop him while he's at the grocery store. You see him load carts of stolen eggs in a grocery basket when you get there. What would you do?

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I'd get on the intercom and announce which egg brands are on sale.
I'd dress up as an egg and walk into the store to enjoy the fun, too!
I'd buy whatever eggs are left to have some to bake with before he steals them all.

Well, it's the end of the day, and Robin is expected to return from vacation tomorrow. Batman says you should stick to your day job but appreciates your help. How would you respond?

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"Wait a minute, Bat guy! Where's my money? Remember, no personal checks!"
"Same time tomorrow? Haha, just kidding. Keep my number on speed dial!"
"Can you fly me first class out of Gotham in the Batmobile?"

What would you do as Batman's unhinged temporary sidekick?

What would you do as Batman's unhinged temporary sidekick?

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